Dear God I'm actually posting this. I knew it was going to be difficult to write, but I didn't think it was going to be this difficult.

Written for the Transgressions: Vices and Virtues contest.

I know the contest said not to write about sex, but rape is not about sex. It is about power. And the decision between virgin and whore is not about sex either - it is about core identity and a dichotomy that has subjugated women for centuries. This story is about my choice between being the virgin or the whore. Traditionally, chaste women were the pinnacle of virtue, and consorting with any other kind of woman was considered a vice. Today's culture still seeks to pigeonhole women into one category or the other, rather than accepting us as more than just a flimsy archetype.

But this story is about more than that too. Is forgiveness virtuous? To forgive someone for wronging you, and in doing so perhaps allow that person to wrong someone else in a similar fashion, is that still virtuous? Is lying still a vice if it is the only way to preserve your sanity? Is telling the truth the more virtuous choice, if you know it will bring you scorn and brand you a liar?

Can a woman be expected to maintain the roll of virtuous chastity while also fulfilling the traditional roll of a submissive woman? Especially in today's climate? Is submitting your will to that of someone you care for virtuous or simply weak? Is giving into this weakness a vice?

This is a deeply personal piece, but I am posting it to start a dialog, so please don't be afraid to comment. I won't be mad. I think these are very important questions, and I thank for hosting this contest so that I could get this story down and present these questions. Now if you haven't already, go and check out all the other lovely entries and submit one yourself! This is my favorite dA contest!

I chose this skin and the tone of the piece (lots of italicized words, ellipses, abbreviations, slang) to reinforce the youth and environment of the protagonist. Imagine it as a note she (I) passed you to read in class.


Submitted to the prompt: Dark Truths vs. White Lies

Thanks for reading.

EDIT OMG A DD!? Thank you so much ^neurotype! Your immense awesomeness does not go unappreciated! I just hope this piece helps those who read it in some way - either by helping foster understanding, or helping young girls to know they aren't alone and they don't have to suffer in silence.

I hope this doesn't sound boastful, but...I'd really like more people to read this, so I'm looking into trying to publish it in some sort of teen-centric publication. Trouble is, I can't find one. So if anyone knows of one or has any ideas, I'd love to hear them.

Thanks so much to those who take the time to read this. I enthusiastically welcome comments (even deep, long ones - they're my favorites), and though I do tend to be slow at answering them, I read them straightaway and cherish them. I will eventually reply, promise.


THANK YOU SO MUCH!